Destination: Unknown

 My oldest sister once planned a destination Thanksgiving for the family. There were seven of us kids at the time, and her idea was to ease the burden on our mom by having each sibling host turkey day at their home. Mom was, of course, still alive and kicking then, and hosting big family parties was something she loved to do and was very good at doing. She had given absolutely no indication that she was tiring of hosting. So, what was the impetus? Well, big sis had simply decided we should all take turns because she is a narcissist and wants things done to suit her desires and needs. OK, she didn't put it that way at all, but I know this person after many decades of being her brother. Well, I thought I did.

It was a dumb, very unnecessary idea, likely designed more to hurt mom than ease any imagined burden. It most definitely was intended to assert dominance. I was living in Memphis at the time, 500-some miles away from the rest of the brothers and sisters. I'm the oldest boy, fourth born in line. That makes me a middle child, but also a first born, if you are scoring at home. My lineage carries some weight, but probably only in my imagination. 

I argued the logistics with her. Everyone but me was married and still doing the family holiday dance of attending two separate family events, or alternating attendance or the winter holidays themselves. Most all families go through this, one way or the other when you have Smith's and Jones and their respective traditions. I shared my opinions with her, and she shot me down gently on each one. She was right and I was wrong, simply by birth order. You may know how that goes. I argued logistics and capabilities with her. Then, she got to my turn, 

"My turn"?? I was divorced and living in a 2-bedroom apartment. How could I host? Moreover, how could my siblings be expected to uproot themselves to drive or fly to a (very) strange city for an afternoon of football and turkey in Uncle Ferrerman's suddenly cramped bachelor pad? She said the sisters could help me host. Okay...but why? This was so totally unnecessary. "Well," she replied, "we could all go out to dinner!" Okay, but why?? 

Of all the sticking points, the stickiest one for me was that I thought it was ridiculous to expect my brothers and sisters to go 500-some miles on a holiday, for a holiday, that could be the biggest disaster this side of "Planes, Trains and Automobiles". This was where I thought I would win. They wouldn't go for that. Her counter: "They will if I say so". 

My turn was three Thanksgivings away. I told her that I planned to be out of town then. She said that was no problem. They would all gather in Memphis anyway, at a nice restaurant and celebrate without me. Well, that made sense...

I was thinking about this with the current kerfuffle over the wedding of Donald Trump Jr. and his most recent bride, Bettina. Their nuptials are transpiring in the Bahamas, and daddy has already sent his regrets via his social media, that due to his war with Iran, he wouldn't be attending. Now, that is a good excuse! 

But is it? The war is a joke and he, as POTUS, could easily threaten Iran with yet another line in the sand and make time for the destination wedding. After all, a minority of people elected him to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants, with no questions asked. The USSC signed off on this even when he was between presidencies. It's almost like they knew...

There has been the usual gnashing of teeth over this. Evidently, the Bahamas has a rule about allowing adjudicated rapists and felons into their country. They are against it. They could deny the sitting US President entry. That would be a bad look! I don't know if that is internet bullshit or not, but it does get some credence when you consider that, of all the places in the world to get married, a couple chooses one where the groom's father is barred. Destination weddings are very strange to me anyway; the domain of the super wealthy or the wanna-be-seen-as super wealthy. The Bahamas seems more like a honeymoon destination to me than a place for the actual nuptials. Neither bride nor groom is Bahamian, so what is the attraction? The attraction may well be a subtraction. I think a lot of destination weddings are a loyalty test. Who will really pay the freight to attend? 

Hair Furor has no hesitation in spending taxpayer money, but the logistics of flying a sitting *wartime president* to a foreign country for a wedding are a BIGLY security concern. That is a BIGLY factor that Mr. and Mrs. Junior surely considered- or counted on. Come on- this was planned! Haven't heard this, but perhaps Junior asked for a White House wedding and daddy shot him down? It has been suggested that a White House wedding could have been an opportunistic selling point for the necessity of a ridiculously expensive, unnecessary ballroom this POTUS wants so badly. Why was that angle overlooked? Well, let's not forget who we're dealing with here. The guy's an idiot. What does he do that does make sense?

I think the intended couple made the right call, regardless of intention. Who wants to hear the father of the groom go on for an hour about how the 2020 election was "stollen" from him, on their big day. It's a long standing Trumptalian tradition that the father of the groom cannot refuse to speak of a stollen election, on the day of his son's second wedding. Plus, he had yet another assassination attempt to attend. 

Now, Thanksgiving that year, I'm not 100% on this, but I think mom let her oldest host that year. I am 100% sure that it was back to moms for Christmas and for future turkey days until she actually did get too old to be hosting. Mom had known her longer than any of us. She knew how to handle her best. I sure do miss mom!