Things About Me

The ladies do not actually call me "Two Nines" because I do not actually carry a Beretta. 

I like to make dick jokes, because I'm immature. It keeps me young.

On another forum, on an internet far, far away, I fancied myself a *big-time bottomspanker*. The reality is, I've only spanked two women and they both had it coming. Come think about it, they both had me coming! <--- get it? Anyways, their bottoms- their calls. They made the right calls.

Speaking of calls, I have so little respect for MLB umpires. They are ruining baseball for the players and fans with their ridiculous, interpretive strike zones. I understand a bad call on the bases, and those can be overturned via replay. Baseball isn't usually life or death, but when you have the power to eject anyone for your feeling that they looked at you wrong after your horrible call, it's the most totalitarian assholery this side of Donald Jerome Trump. 

Speaking of him, it's insulting to our collective intelligence that the goal posts are buried so far underground and scurrying around like moles, to tell us there has to be a list, or nothing can be done. You have the fucking testimony of the women who were minors when Trump raped them. How is that not enough? How does a list prove or disprove anything?

The people who love and respect Trump are idiots. The people who fear him are worse.

I have my father's disdain for stupid people. It might show at times.

I have my mother's compassion towards stupid people. I need the balance. 

I hate tribalism whether it's based on ethnicity, gender or politics. 

The hardest part about writing is figuring out what you want to write about. I usually just start and see where it takes me. It often winds up well. Or, I make a list. We all know how fucking important lists are over everything else.